Robert Brink - Writer

Skateboarding & Porn: Still Happy Together!

August 23, 2006 | Skip To The Comments (2)

How hot is that armpit sweat puddle?

Obviously I'm a product of Big Brother magazine...Not embarrassed to admit it either. Besides, its been a while since I've interacted with some porno stars!

Got word of this release party for Skater Girl Fever and just couldn't pass up the opportunity to go to a porno suarè. Headed to Beauty Bar in LA, only to be slightly dissapointed by the fact that I didn't see any nudity, all the girls from the movie (actually, I only recognized two of them from all the promo photos I've seen, so let's just say "all the girls I saw") looked about 15 (I think this is probably how old porn people want their girls to look these days) and were not as cute as they are here, and there were lots of dudes lookin' hip as hell. Many of them with glasses not unlike this dude. Why are so many porno industry dudes nearly blind?

40-plus dominatrixes (sorry, don't know the plural of "dominatrix") pseudo licking jukeboxes always gets me hot.

Basically, me and Carboy sat in the corner while passers by made comments about us looking gay. Disclaimer: I am not gay, neither is Carboy to the best of my knowledge, but I don't mind blatant "canal pal" accusations every once in a while. There was this one 60-year-old dude snapping photos like the world was about to end. I swear he must have filled up his memory card on this 15-minute makeout session (seen below) alone: Fuckin' weirdo...really.

Even porno girls know the "mall grab."

Evidently, the stars of this movie are Charlotte Stokely, Kimberly Kane and Gia Jordan. I saw the Charlotte chick there for sure. she's the one licking that girl's leg in the above photo. She looked 12 and spent the whole night dyking out (as the pictures show) I only list those names here because all the pervs Googling their names will find my site eventually if I do. That's called maximizing exposure! Here's a small gallery!

By the way, as if I need to say it like you don't already know, this party (as is the movie I'm sure) was just another a feeble and uneducated/poorly researched attempt at a large corporation using skateboarding to make some cash. Tsk tsk. But hey, I'd still prefer porno companies do it than Mountain Dew or Slim Jim. At least then we get some porno party invites, cute chicks drunk and making out in front of us, tits and ass.