Celebrities With Dyslexia
Celebrities with Dyslexia
By Rob Brink
February 2003
Here's another one that was slated to go in Stance magazine but never saw the light of day because the mag folded. My idea was to make it a column for each issue where I would find a different "disorder" or "condition" and find celebrities to fit the list. Future lists would have included Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and things of that nature. If this article offends you, as it is seeming to do to many, chill out, it's a joke. And the point wasn't to make fun of Dyslexia or people who have it, it's merely pointing out that celebrities have imperfections too.
Society has done a pretty good job of showing us how meaningless we all are in comparison to the many “oh-so-important” celebrities of the world. But you know what? Most celebrities are just like us—they are just better at hiding it or have more money than God and can pay to hide it. They fart like us, they pick their nose like us, and they take big shits in the morning and get pimples too. Truthfully, they probably wish they could lead normal lives like we do. And once you discover all the shortcomings that these celebrities have, you might not feel so inferior.
Dyslexia is a language-based learning disorder where the victims often spell or write words and letters incorrectly, backwards, or reversed. For example: dog becomes bog or God becomes dog. Sometimes left is felt and a W is an M. Yeah, don't expect a letter from a dyslexic anytime soon. Usually they avoid writing at all costs. Here's some famous people who admit to having or are believed to have or had Dyslexia. If you ever see them in public and ask them for an autograph, try to trip ‘em up a bit by asking them to write a note before their signature or something:
- Tom Cruise—Do you think he has trouble reading Dianetics?
- Cher—I wonder if her plastic surgeon has Dyslexia too.
- Bruce Jenner—He was a jock, what else do you expect?
- Noel Ghallager (of Oasis)—Crazy that a guy who can't spell can write songs that make millions of dollars.
- Scott Adams (The guy who draws Dilbert the comic)—I guess that's why he draws instead of writes.
- Whoopi Goldberg—You could have a lot of fun misspelling her name. “Goldie Poohberg!”
- Leonardo Da Vinci—The Mona Lisa was so famous that he didn't need to know how to spell.
- Michaelangelo—You have to be screwed up to want to paint the ceiling of a church for years anyway.
- Thomas Edison—Would you fly a kite during a thunderstorm?
- Albert Einstein —He was a dyslexic vegetarian. I wonder if he ever confused tofu for real meat.
- Carl Lewis—Another jock.
- W. B. Yeats—Did they have proofreaders back then? Poetry sucks anyway.
- Woodrow Wilson—What president isn't fucked up?
- Jay Leno—Even his hair color is confused.
- Nelson Rockefeller—Why does a dyslexic get an ice skating rink in Manhattan named after him? Oh wait, he paid for it.
- Erin Brockovich—No, not Julia Roberts. Surely, she's a genius compared to the real Erin Brockovich.
- Nolan Ryan—Jock number three.
- Henry Winkler—The Fonz. They must have known he was stupid when they wrote the part for him.
- Winston Churchill—He also had a lisp. Double whammy—couldn't write or speak properly.
(24) responses to: Celebrities With Dyslexia
Aimee said:
Albert Einstein one was so funny!
oh and by the way...Bruce Jenner likes boys too!! Shhh....you didnt hear it from me :x
Millie said:
I don't get why its like your making fun of people with dyslexia.... makes no sense!
Ashley said:
Im a High School student with Dyslexia, and I really dont like the fact of how people talk about people with Dyslexia.
Lisa from Summer School said:
I have dyslexia and I still passed my drivers test. However, I still struggle with seatbelts and long street names.
Dave said:
This list might have actually been funny if you actually knew anything bout dyslexia. I know people with it and what you explained it as was not right bit. I'm all up for laughs bout it like "Did you hear about the dyslexic devil worshipper who sold his soul? He sold his soul to santa" or other such jokes but if its not done right its invalid.
jog on
Dave said:
Also its proven that most people with dyslexia are above average intelligence and that whole list proves you wrong :( shame
dave said:
hiya stupid dave croft sed
Shirley Claxton said:
I have read the list of the celebrities that had or have Dyslexia, some of these people also had or have ADHD is that because both complaints go hand in hand.
So's Your Face said:
some of your comments are rather amusing but i agree with the above person, you can only make a bit of a lighthearted joke about these sufferers if you explain correctly what dyslexia is. otherwise its just you that looks like a twat!
sylvie said:
I,m suspecting that I'm a little Dyslexic...... how can I be sure? is there a thing called semi dyslexic?
Yo momma said:
My papa had dyslexia, he passed away and i'm still havin a hard time with dealin with that:o( I think the fact that ur makin fun of these dyslexics is not funny. Mr. Brink, r u dyslexic?? Otherwise, i don't think you have the right. its just plain rude. u should be ashamed!
I H8 UR NAN said:
u r a fucking ass u dont even know what it is!!!!!
I H8 UR NAN said:
u r a fucking twatty cunt face ur making fun of people proven to be ssmarter than u!!! ur just a fucking retard.
u r gay said:
cunt
jodie said:
this website is really cruel to people with dyslixia just because they are a bit different on the insiede doesnt mean that there different on the outside and they are all humans like this. i think you need to no that dyslexias not a disability its a difficulty. the people above have oviously got further in life than you and it's harder for them so what does that say about you.
jodie said:
we have been doing about people with dyslexia in english and your wrong and its people like you that make dyslwics lifes mysrible
Quinn said:
I just wanted to let you know that I am a dyslexic and a filmmaker, not in Hollywood yet but will be there one day. I also wanted to let you know that if you make fun of dyslexics then you should go and make fun of a paraplegic. But you can be anybody that who has dyslexia; for example I com from German and Scotch/Irish Royalty...My great, great, great, great, great grandmother was Princes Johanna Dorothea of the princely house of Reuss; but that doesn't make me any different from anybody, if you know what I mean. I am also a surfer and snowboarder and have boarded the Aspen Highland Bowel and hope to board the back country of Alaska. The people who you made fun of are the probably the most important people in the world and they most certainly help shape the world as it is today. Da Vinci was dyslexic, but wrote a code that took the smartest people in the world to figure out for hundreds of years. I also wanted to let you know that... you sound like a ...fucking asshole for writing that article, for making fun a disorder that you have no idea of what is like living with every fucking day. Don't every make fun of something you have no clue about what you are talking about again. Peace Out.
remove this article said:
fukin prick you r you moron
fuck u brink said:
Fuck U Mr. Rob Brink, u don't know what the fuck ur talkin about........
niralie said:
i m a special educator...dedicating my life to all the kids tht are "differently abled"...well the fact tht u have so much of info abt dyslexic...makes me feel tht u r a 1.... i would want to talk to u...
mail me at nirali7in@yahoo.co.in
Michael Flusche said:
I also have dyslexia & a mild case of ADHD. I was born with the cord around my neck. When I was 16 months old, I had spinal meningitus, I was paralyzed on my right side (left half of brain). Than when I was 2-3 years old, I nearly drownd in our pool. On April 13, 1996, when I was 15 years old I picked my Junior prom date up. We took pictures. I did not attend my Junior prom. I had my head, neck, back, ribs & pelvis all broken. Now I have become ambedextros. After my accident, I was in the hospital for 3 months. The doctors thought I would not be able to walk, talk or do anything normal. In fact, I defied them a year after I got out of the hospital.
I can write with both hands but I write dexlexic with my right hand.
I returned that August to finish up with my classmates. I graduated that following May of 1997. I teach swim lessons. I teach swm lessons every 2nd & 3rd week in July. Please contact me if you want to know more at shmikes001@yahoo.com
sars said:
Get over yourselves. Surely if you have a 'condition' whether it be dyslexia, austism, bad eye sight, big ears, or just plain doppy. Admit your problem, move on and get a life. I have children with austism and dyslexia, who are well adjusted, polite, friendly people who work hard and have fun. If you think this web site is making fun of you - think again - it is merely letting you know that you are not alone and its nothing to be ashamed of.
Perhaps Tom Cruise is the exception - he is just plain ugly and weird.
Tricia said:
I think that this is really stupid. I have dyslexia and I'm not stupid. Dyslexia is nothing to be ashamed of, and why make fun of all of those people? They got over it and did great things.
Get a life!
Oh, and by the way, Benjamin Franklin flew a kite in a lightening storm. Thomas Edison invented the incandescent light bulb. Who's the stupid one now?
spencer said:
all the people you mocked are all far more successful than you ever will be.
i wonder if you had dyslexia could you overcome the hardships it comes with and achieved as much as these great people did?
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